Broken Hearts and Blue Veins🩵 (Part 4/5)

CHAPTER SEVEN: 

“What happened, Achilles? All good? You haven’t been talking much since a few days.?” Dom asked Achilles when he came along me and Natalia to meet him at the hospital post college. 

The question was asked by Dom but has been roaming in mind also for long days. It was only 2 days since he got discharged but it didn’t matter. He was just discharged from one ward to another. But the spark was kind of missing from him. And instead of the number of bandages reducing from his body, they had increased. Why were bandages around his right wrist and arm area? No needles were loaded there. Why is his whole head covered in a bunch of bundles? Has anything happened? 

Once Dom and Natalia left after meeting him, I decided to stay back and talk to him. 

“You didn’t leave with them?” 

“Umm, no. I…actually. I want to spend some time with you.” 

I try to go and kiss him on the neck but he pulls away, and looks onto the other side. He has never done so. I try again going close to him but he stops me by saying, “Sapphira, it’s better to stay far, you know, I am not in the state where someone would like to come closer to me.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“I have a lot of scars. In and out. I…” 

"Scars means you are alive and strong enough to survive. I'll worship each of your scars until you're able to face them, dear." 

“That doesn’t justify that I am going to die.” 

“I…I…kn…know…I know that, Achilles. But that doesn’t make any difference. I still love you.” 

He ignores me and hurriedly tries to connect his Bluetooth to his phone and plays music. But it doesn’t get connected and the music plays at its loudest. 

"Is that why you play the music so loud? A beat to drown out the thoughts, sound so high you cannot think, lyrics so close to home that you don't even blink." 

He breaks down and starts crying while hugging me. “Eve…every part…every part of my body feels like it is falling apart from my heart. This…this pain…this pain is torturous. Absolutely impossible to bear. I am in such a situation where I want to die at this instant moment. I feel like if I will stay alive then my mind will kill me. I feel like a burden. I am a burden for my family. That’s why they left me here, in this hospital, when I was just an infant. I haven’t even seen them, Sapphira. And the doctors here says that I have been caught with this heart disease since they found me. That proves, that my own family thought me of, as a burden. And now, I am a burden on you. You are leaving your college and all for me. And I am going to live you and this world. To be honest, I have been trying to live this world for a long time but it never works. Some or the other time, someone or something comes, and I have to live again. I am not even good at dying. All these marks on my body, which you always ask about, are all from my attempts to un-alive myself. All those bandages, I told you were of routine check-ups, were of my practice to get spiritless.” 

1st July, 2022 

Dear Diary, 

And in that moment, I realised, he was his own disease. I could feel everyone's pain but his was different. He was hurting more than anyone else but smiled the most. H e made me curious and followed like a stargazer looking at a star. I kept looking at him but was going to lose him none the less. He was the brightest star out there but also the one who felt the burn. I tried to save him and thought I was successful until I saw him lifeless today with no pain and no smile. Every time, he tried taking h is life, he took away my curse of being able to feel others pain. His sorrow wasn't something, someone could handle. 

Good night! 

CHAPTER EIGHT: 

I was with Achilles for the whole night. We made love to each other so many times that we even forgot the count. I had to leave for college in the morning but I returned in the evening to him, again. For the entire day, my only thought was Achilles. I couldn’t divert my mind off him. I straight away went to the store room because I knew I will be finding him there indulged deeply into his world of books. There he was. As beautiful as the first day, when I saw. Little smile, little tensed. 

“Here you are Anam Cara.” 

His smile widened. He pulled me besides him on the floor by grabbing me by the waist and took me in a deep kiss. 

“What did you write now, Mr. Poet?” 

“You will love it.” 

“I love every word you write. I love everything about you, Achilles.” 

“I wrote a spoken word describing our last night.” 

“Then what are you waiting for? Read it for me.” 

“It was just you and me; 

Sitting on the bed, Half-naked. 

We were drinking cheap wine and eating cold pizza. 

We were nothing but two fuck-ups 

Who loved fucking and fucking each other up. 

We couldn’t help but laugh. 

Caught between rounds, 

We were too lazy for anything else 

Other than more sex. 

And so, We lie down, play dead. 

Undies on the floor, hearts at the door. 

We both felt like we desired more, 

But we had never really reached 

Anything past this stage before. 

We are creatures of convenience; 

sexual deviants 

Who are always just one "2AM text" away. 

There was a time when; 

We were still a mystery to each other. 

Do you remember? 

We were supposed to be the answers to each other's prayers. 

But that was from way before, 

way before we became each other's lovers.” 

4th July, 2022 

Dear Diary, 

Today, i n the gentle twilight of an intimate setting, I found myself drawn to him, captivated by his words that flowed like a river of emotions. The room seemed to come alive with his poetry, each verse a brushstroke painting vivid images within my mind. As he recited his heartfelt lines, his voice carried a resonance that resonated deep within me. The way he weaved words together ignited a fire within my soul, evoking feelings that danced with every syllable. I watched his lips, so beautifully articulating his thoughts, and felt an indescribable connection forming between us. 

In that moment, our eyes met, and I saw a reflection of his vulnerability, his passion, and his desire. A surge of admiration washed over me, intertwining with the newfound intimacy we shared through his poetry. I could feel my heart racing, matching the rhythm of his words, as I leaned in closer, wanting to convey my appreciation in a way words could not capture. With a subtle hesitation, our lips finally met. It was a gentle, tender kiss that spoke volumes, a wordless exchange of the profound connection we had discovered. In that embrace, our souls seemed to merge, as if our shared love for his artistry had transcended into a love between us. His kiss held the essence of his poetry, each touch and caress an extension of the emotions he had unveiled in his verses. I could taste the vulnerability and passion, a mingling of desires and dreams. Time seemed to stand still as we became entwined in a dance of longing and affection, our sh ared appreciation for his poetic expression deepening the intimacy we had found. 

In that stolen moment, our hearts aligned, beating in harmony to the rhythm of our newfound love. I felt a profound gratitude for the words that had brought us together, for the beauty of his poetry that had ignited a flame within us both. As our lips part ed, we shared a knowing smile, understanding that this encounter was just the beginning of a journey intertwined with love, poetry, and the magic that had unfolded between us. 

I knew I was pulling my Achilles back into life, away from death. And that’ s all that mattered.